I'm really into asian looking animals
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
