It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
