I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
