So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
This baby is an asshole
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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