Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
