its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
