so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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