they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
