Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
there was a trapeze. enough said
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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