Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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