wake up i wanna do it froggy style
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
