I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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