Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
