he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
