a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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