I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
