What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
