Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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