We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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