What a fucking waste of an outfit
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
