two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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