Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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