So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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