so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
