if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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