Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
