So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
