my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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