I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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