I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
