Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
