it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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