I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
how does that bad decision feel?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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