Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
