sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Plan B is the new Plan A
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
