i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
