I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Randomize
