I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize