thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
