omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
