; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
