guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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