im holly from the hills drunk
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
oh god was she eating orange peels again
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
40s are totally the cure
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
