Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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