problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
