I will die if light touches me.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I understand Curling. That high.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
