i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
