Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
