"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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