He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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